Tears from the skies, tears from my eyes

I like to consider myself an equal opportunity weather runner. Sure I savor those ideal conditions... light breeze, sunshine (but not too much) & 50 degree temps but I'll take whatever I can get and will run in anything. So when this past weekend's forecast reared it's ugly head I knew my choices for an "ideal" LR day would be limited. Saturday showed up looking like a day severely beaten with the ugly stick and Sunday showed little promise for more attractiveness. I then resorted to these sorta-kinda rules I have in my mind with regard to running. The one in particular, it's better to just suck it up and make it happen in whatever the current conditions are - tomorrow could be better but it could also be worse. With that in mind and a number of hours already spent delaying the inevitable I set out for my 2nd 20 miler in the plan.

It was rainy, it was 40*, it was windy with 25 MPH steady winds and gusts of up to 50 MPH and it was gray. Despite that all, I didn't feel bad those first several miles and in fact took off way too fast for the day's work. I recalled the words I exchanged with J right before I left... "man this is gonna suck" and then a pause and a quick recant "...no, no it's not, it's gonna be awesome". No way was I gonna break another of my rules regarding negative thoughts at the start of a LR. And he responded something like "this will be your best run yet", of course saying it to simply get my butt out the door. But it left a mark and when I recalled the words I asked myself, why shouldn't this be my best run yet? Why couldn't this be my best run yet? So those words marinated there for quite a bit.

And the run got a bit tougher as the miles went on but never real bad. My nutrition was spot on, my energy was high and my headphones were pumping out the tunes. My pace stayed steady and true and my heart rate stayed low. I turned around heading north now and ran all of the middle miles directly in to the wind and rain and at several points, small hail. Mommy! IT SUCKED. Now it didn't suck all at once. I checked in with myself and allowed the wind to be acknowledged, allowed the rain to be noted and decided that it shouldn't matter. I was running well, it's not ideal but I'm running well. I had to stay running in this direction until at least mile 15 and then I could turn back around and finish with the crap to my back.

And then somewhere after mile 14 it got to be reckoning time.

I was barely moving forward, the wind was so strong and so severe that I could not feel movement whatsoever. I was also thoroughly soaked by this point, the last time I attempted to eat a shot block I had to spend way too much time pawing open my hand held, the digits simply did not work, they were frozen solid. My playlist had also since finished but I had no way to make my hands work the iPod.

But I H.A.D. to get to at least mile 15. HAD to.

At one point I felt like tears were imminent and honestly I could have been crying. There was absolutely no differentiation between my rain soaked face and water of the saltier variety. And then after glancing down at the Garmin and seeing 14.87 just a bit ago, it was here. It was there. Glorious mile 15.

I turned around and instantly felt just how much of a wind I'd been running in to, now I was actually scared of being blown over. No joke. It was craziness. But it was behind me.

The wind.

The rain in my face.

The hugest of huge mental hurdles.

I finished the run without incident, without any excuses, without any walking, without any regret.

And without any doubt that if I could run 20 miles in those conditions at a still respectable clip, I could truly run in anything.

And J was right, it was the best run yet!